Yes, I may be getting a new boyfriend. I may just be getting hooked up with this eighth grader who is on the wrestling team who happens to be really sexy. Sorry, pardon my language, but it is a fact! He's single, and looking for a girlfriend, but I got this huge lecture from my other friend who doesn't approve of my liking him because apparently he's a flirt. I'm so mad at her right now, and I think the only reason she disapproves of this relationship between me and him is because she's been hurt so many times by guys she just doesn't trust them anymore. I'm different then her and I can't understand why she doesn't trust me in simple things. I understand that she doesn't want me to get hurt, but seriously, sometimes I can handle myself without a babysitter which is what she's being. The guys have a wrestling practice today after school and I'm kind of torn between going to all of that, and missing out on Miamaid Camp, or going to part of it and still going to camp. The reason I would stay the whole time is because I wanted to talk to this guy after the practice and get to know him... I guess I could just text him like my friend suggested, but I think it would work a lot better to talk in person because I usually use electronics to hide behind when I can really be myself... See my issue? I mean, I feel like I need to go to Miamaid camp, but I still want to talk to this guy, and see what my options are. I did get dressed up just for him... and I mightaswell take advantage of that. My friend seems to think that her friend--the guy who I might go out with will like me just as much as I like him, but he seems to be out of my league because of how amazing he is. Okay, maybe I should stop complaining now... I have a good life, but I need someone to take care of me. You know what I'm saying? Someone who can love me more than my parents can, and who will respect me, and help me make good decisions. I need a guy who will hold me in his arms when I'm sad, and wipe away my tears when I cry. Well, tears are coming to my eyes now... and I don't know why. I've been told that guys aren't worth your tears, but seriously, some really are... also, I've been told that the boy who is worth your tears won't make you cry... I don't know what to believe anymore. Believe it or not, I have been hurt too. I'm one of those girls who loves hard, then falls even harder. Believe me, it sucks to be me. No, I am most definitely not suicidal again, but I'm kind of on the verge of tears. I think things are going to work out, then kaboom, they don't; and I'm thrown back into the despair that I've always seemed to find myself in. I think I'm going to be a lot happier when I've figured all of this out, and I'm happily talking to Harrison/Harryson however you spell it. Yep, just gave you his name! Anyway, wish me luck! I still haven't made my decision about the practice, but I know that I have to go to a little bit of wrestling. I just hope he doesn't get hurt again... <3
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